Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize