she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Randomize
