What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Blood and glitter go together right?
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
My feet surprised me
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize