can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
