O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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