Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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