I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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