You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
