who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
