But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I accidentally burped into my bong.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
