what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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