Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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