just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
