party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
too bad you live with your parents still
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
