Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
