I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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