Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Randomize
