omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
