I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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