Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
