He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize