Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize