How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Randomize
