Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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