I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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