I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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