I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize