I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize