there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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