why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
