wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
