He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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