why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
