Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
