...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
