I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
