he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I think I just shit out all my problems.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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