i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
