You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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