the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
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