Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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