Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
