I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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