Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
