That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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