Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
