If that was your dad, he is hot
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
