You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
