I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
