U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
